Mar 22, 2011

Patience is a virtue....and a fruit of the spirit.

Since meeting Rob I have been learning patience. Rob is the most wonderful man and truly is my Mr. Incredible, but he comes with the United States Marine Corps. I realize I have it extremely lucky because he's never been deployed and the chances of him being deployed are actually really slim, but he is gone for chunks at a time. A week or two or three is no comparison to the years some are away from their families but it's still hard.

Last year when he was gone for his annual training in Peru, it was for three weeks and I only had one week of communication and that was even limited. It was hard. I didn't handle it well and I was a mess. I never thought that I could miss someone that much. I always fancied myself independent, but since I met Rob he has become my world and my everything. And being completely cut off without even knowing if he landed safely was horrible. People kept telling me that after we're married or been together for a couple years I would welcome him being away. And my response every time was that I never would want him be away. Why would I want the man I love to be in a different state or country with no communication? Why wouldn't I want to spend every possible moment with him? I wouldn't think my relationship would be very strong or lasting if I wanted to be away from him all the time.

He was gone in February and actually got back the day of the blizzard to Reno. But at least we got to skype, which was awesome because I got to see his face at least. And now this week, he's gone again. This time to Quantico until Saturday. And our future still holds two more annual training. One coming just a week after we get back from our honeymoon, so we won't even get to spend our first month anniversary together. He'll be gone. But I'm proud of him and everything he does. (And this definitely includes Garmin - because basically he's awesome and he loves that job and I'm glad).

But all of this, him being gone and busy all the time has been teaching me patience. Now sometimes it doesn't go well. I'm only human and I falter, but I'm trying. I know that he loves me so much and he would do anything not to be away and that definitely helps, knowing that. Him being away is hard because I would much whether be with him, but God doesn't always give you what you want. He gives you what you need and what's best for you. Now, I have a hard time believing that Rob being miles away for weeks at a time is the best for me. But maybe there's a bigger picture here. It's about growing in who I am and become more confident and having my own life (with and without Rob) and about learning to be patient. So I'm trying this patience thing because on Saturday God will bring my beautiful husband-to-be back home again, and I will have learned something in the week he was away.

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