Sep 21, 2015

A Pregnancy Story: 15 Weeks

Now that you are about the size of an apple, you are about 4 inches long and weighing about 2-1/2
ounces. This is the earliest that we would be able to find out if you are a girl or a boy, but that would all depend on you and your position. However, we won't be finding out for another couple of weeks. But there is still plenty going on this week. You are squirming like crazy in there, with your legs lengthening. You are also moving amniotic fluid through your nose and upper respiratory tract, which helps your lungs begin to develop. You can also sense light now, even though your eyelids are fused shut, so if I shine a flashlight at you, you are most likely going to move away from the light.


I'm feeling good. It seems that my days are getting better. If only I knew how to feed myself. I'm definitely starting to get hungrier and feeling less sick but I have no idea what to eat most of the time. The morning sickness is hanging on a little bit, but for the most part I'm definitely better. I just wish the morning sickness was completely gone, but I'll take what I can get. If it's just once of twice a eek instead of multiple times a day then I'm good. Usually I get sick because I had a craving and my body didn't agree with what I ate, so it's mostly my own fault. I really want a good night's sleep. That isn't asking too much, is it? I don't know if it's the getting up to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night or my inability to get comfortable or the fact that I have a cat and a husband who get cold and pen me in, but I haven't slept decent in a couple weeks now. I'm so looking forward to getting more energy back in the second trimester but that's never going to happen at this rate if I don't get some sleep! Pregnancy brain is killing me. I have a lot of "what did I do" moments. I am so scattered and all over the place. Don't tell me any important right now that I need to remember because most likely I won't. I'm also incredibly clumsy. I am seriously a mess. Between the pregnant brain, I am tripping over things, dropping everything, bending back fingernails, bruising myself. Your dad noticed I had a cut on my hand and asked what I did. I had no idea. Of course, on top of everything else I am also an emotional mess. I will likely start crying at random times. Hormones are getting the best of me right now.

If you know me at all then you know that I hate being pregnant. I love the end result but being pregnant just doesn't agree with me. I have constant morning sickness, I barely sleep, I'm hungry all the time but never sure what to eat. I'm just not one of those glowing pregnant women. In fact I am actually a bit mean when I'm pregnant. Okay, so I'm a lot mean. I tend to be a cynical person when I'm not pregnant but when I am pregnant it's all kicked up a notch. I get grouchy, cynical, cranky and just mean. By nature I am not a happy-go-lucky person and that doesn't suddenly change when I'm pregnant. I just don't glow. I knew going into this pregnancy - after working so hard to get pregnant in the first place - that it wasn't going to be pleasant for me. However I forgot how mean I get. everything is made worse because I'm tired, sick and I have a stubborn toddler to deal with all day long. But of course I'm not going to take my meanness out on my 2 year old. So the poor hubs has to deal with the worse of it. He has to deal with the up and down emotions. He has to deal with the crazy hormones. He has to deal with my complaining about just about everything. I get angry at the world. I get angry at my body for being sick. I get angry at my toddler for refusing to eat lunch again. I get angry at my laptop for moving slow. I get angry at my baseball team for losing again. I get angry at him for chewing loudly. And he never seems to know when it's coming. One minute things will be fine and the next I'll be snapping about something. I'm just a grouchy pregnant woman. But the wonderful man that he is, he takes it. He listens and tries to not make it worse. He takes the toddler off my hands. He tells me to stop reading the news. He bashes my baseball team with me. He sits across the room to eat his tortilla at 10 at night. The man is a saint. Me, however, not so much. I do have to remind myself it's all worth it, but sometimes you just are grouchy and that's all there is to it.

(Saturday, September 12 - Friday, September 18)

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